The Vampire Father
by Hinotezeke
Summary: they join the mafia...
1. jobs

**Sorry for not writing in a year…**

**Major writers block.**

_1:Jobs_

**BPOV**

"I don't wanna go to school anymore," Rosalie complained.

"Why not?" Carlisle asked all of us.

"We know everything!" Alice screamed.

"Fine but you have to get jobs instead then." He answered.

"What? I've never had a Job though!" Rosalie said shocked.

"Wow…" Edward laughed.

"Well what kind of jobs?" Jasper asked.

"What ever you feel like that you can get." Carlisle said, finely having the argument go his way.

"Cool…" Jasper and Emmett looked at each other evilly and left.

"I wanna work at a Mall!" Alice said and ran away.

"What should I do," The loch ness monster said.

"You don't need a job Nessie since your getting married soon," Esme smiled at her.

"I'll go catch up with Jasper and Emmett," Edward ran after them.

"Ugh, I'll go find something…" Rosalie mumbled.

"Well I guess I'll be going to then…" I said.

-----------------------------------------------Later------------------------------------------------------

"So how'd job hunting go?" Carlisle asked.

"It went well…" Emmett said.

"I don't want to know do I?" Carlisle asked.

"No you don't, trust me." Edward murmured.

"I got a job at the mall selling shoes!" Alice said while giving an unwilling Nessie new shoes. "To much like your mother!"

"I couldn't find anything…" Rosalie said.

"Well either you get a job or you go to school," Carlisle told her.

"FINE!" and she stormed away.

"I got a job at Walmart." I said.

"Wow what you have to do, know what color blue is?" Emmett asked.

"Hey!"

"What are you going to do you aren't a new born anymore! But I'll stop for a year if Edward can beat me in a wrestling match without his power!"

"Emmett it doesn't turn off." Edward said.

"But she can turn it off and you know it!"

"Ugh, you're the biggest baby ever, but fine." We went 5 miles away and Edward lost without his powers, big shock.

"Yes! And the champion issssss EMMETT the master of the world!" He said. Then his phone rang. "Oop business calls, gotta go!"

"Me too," Jasper said. Then Edward went to.

"What are they doing?" Carlisle starred into the horizan.

"You'll find out soon." Alice said walking away."


	2. buisness

**Yeah chapter two! **

_2:business_

**JPOV**

"I swear I'll have the money!" some poor helpless guy cried.

"Mr. Ed wants his money now," Emmett held the guy up in the air.

"Pa…pa…please, I have a wife, 3 kids, and a mistress!" *Ring ring*

"AH huh," Emmett answered the phone. "He says you got a week."

"Thank you!"

"Bye see you in a week tell your love children I said hi!"

"That was hilarious!" I said.

"And it pays great!"

"Yeah…" I agreed.

"I'm bored…"

"We could go to walmart, the mall or scare J. Jenks."

"I like walmart!"

"Of course you do…"

--------------------------------------------Later at wallyworld--------------------------------------

**BPOV**

"Bella!" Emmett screamed.

"Why…," I asked into space. "Shouldn't you be at work?"

"It's more of a night job any way."

"Well actually I'm here to give a message to your boss from mine," Jasper said.

"Who would your boss be?" I asked.

"Your husband."

"What are you guys doing anyway?" I asked. "and why do you have that accent?"

"We joined the Mafia and Edward took it over about 5 minutes!" Emmett whispered.

"WHAT!?" I screamed. "THAT #%$$?."

"What's with all the ruckus over here?" The manager asked.

"Mr. Ed wants his monthly cash for the protection of your store." Emmett said ignoring me.

"Of course!" The helpless guy said. He left and brought the money to Emmett. "Oh and your fired for screaming that." He told me.

"She Mr. Ed's wife." Jasper said.

"Your promoted!"

---------------------------------------------later-------------------------------------------------------

"Hey Bella!" Edward said.

"How was work?"

"Good, you?"

"Great I got promoted cause you took over the mafia."

"Yeah…"

"Why?"

"I was bored."

"Ugh..."

"YOU joined the Mafia?!!" Carlisle screamed. "Aro will kill me for this! Not to mention Nessie's getting married, then I'll be a great grandpa!"

"Oh no not another midlife crisis," Esme said. "This is the fifth one."


	3. just visiting

_3: Just visiting_

**APOV**

"Hey Jazz!" I said as he walked in the store.

"Hey, what is it?" I asked after receiving about 20 texts.

"I got promoted!"

"Why didn't you just write that in the text or wait till we got home?"

"That wouldn't be any fun," I pouted and jumped over the counter.

"Hey Emmett and _Mr. Ed._"

"Hello Alice," Edward said, "How's shoe selling?"

"It's great, I'm going to quit and go work at something else though."

"Why?" Edward asked.

"You never join work and hobbies, it takes the fun out of it."

"So where are you going to work?" Jasper asked looking in extra pain now that a crying teenager ran by.

"I don't know…"

"You could come and work with us…" Edward and the rest smiled evilly and as the saw all the possibilities.

"Sure why not." I said. This will be fun! I could be a secretary or an assassin or work at a pizza store, or collect money…

"How about all of the above?" Edward said.

**Later at Mr. Eds Pizza**

**EdPOV**

"Can I have a…" Random customer #123458673683 started.

"A cheese with extra crust, got it." Alice finished for him.

"But I didn't finish…"

"Yes you did."

_Weird I guess I did though… besides she's hot!_

_But she must work for him… _I laughed at this, being in a mob was fun, especially since I'm the boss, and no one can stop me. "Mah hahaha!"

"Edward stop evilly laughing and going mad with your power!" Alice said.

"God I must have gained 10 pounds!" Rosalie said.

"Rose that's impossible…" Emmett said, drawing a new card from the deck. "Ha full house!"

"Emmett this is black jack." Jasper said irritated.

"Really?" He asked

_Hey Edward._ "Benjamin? What are you doing here?"

"Yeah shouldn't you be doing Pharaoh stuff?" Emmett asked. "Like getting slaves to build things?"

"Emmett just because I'm Egyptian doesn't mean I'm a Pharaoh, or that I have slaves for that matter." He said.

"Whatever."

"So what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Just dropping by to say hello, It can get boring staying with the same family forever."

"No ones bored here with me!" Emmett smiled.

"Hey while you're here want to join my mob?" I asked him.

_Such morally corrupt eyes, can't say no for fear of immortal life…_

"Of course I will…"

**Well that's all for today… but next chapter will be action!**

"**Merry slavemas to all!" Emmett said.**

"**Shut up!" ME **


	4. corporate take over sorta

**Yeah! The action chapter where it goes **_**back in time**_** to show how they built up there mob and took over! (With cake!)**

_4:Corprate takeover…sorta_

**EdPOV**

"Well if we have to get jobs, we should get something good!" Emmett said, as we walked down the street of down town *cough cough*. _Something like working at a strip bar!_

"The girls will kill us if we do Emmett," I said picking up a bottle and hitting him on the head with it.

"What?" Jasper asked. "Never mind I can tell by his emotions."

_Fine then just a topless one then._

"No! I'll get blamed for it anyway." I said.

"You're no fun!" He pouted.

"We can do something fun, just not perverse." I told him, then bumping into someone.

"Hey idiot watch were your going!" random angry guy #1 said.

"Sor…" I started but got interrupted by Emmett.

"You gonna make him?" He said pushing the guy.

"Emmett stop!" I said.

"He works for the Mafia, I saw him on the news, which gives me a great idea." He said picking up him and his partner.

"Pppleee…se." They begged.

"Take us to your boss, we need a job." He smiled evily.

And so they did as Emmett commanded and they later found themselves in the main office of the mafia leader.

"So you want jobs huh?" he said. "That can be arranged.

"Actually I was thinking something higher…" Emmett said picking up the man and threatening him within an inch of his life. "Where can I find your superior?"

Much later after the same thing happening they find themselves at the highest man.

"Alright, you threaten all my chain of men and ask for a job? Are you crazy I should shoot your asses!"

"You see we want _your _job." Emmett said.

"Kill 'em!" He said.

Then Emmett sped behind him and snapped his neck. Jasper and I realizing it was to late had to help kill the other men in the room. Jasper grabbed a guys gun and shot half of the room. I just stood stunned and stared at this.

"Well that was fun," Emmett wiped the blood off his hands.

"What they hell did you do!?" I screamed staring at the massacre.

"I got us jobs!" Emmett said, breaking the lock on the safe and pulled out files. "But I can't do this business stuff, so Edward you can be incharge."

"Why, you idiot!"

_think about it, all the money, and power! Connections, power, hentchmen, power, fun, power…_

**Next chapter soon with an epic conclusion, maybe.**


	5. taking care ub bidness

**Now were back in the present, so as not to confuse you.**

**Last time on The vampire father, "Jasper, you were black mailing me?" **

"**Yes it was I, Edward."**

"**Edward I'm pregnant." Bella**

"**Yeah!"**

"**I think Jacob's the fat… OUCH, you punched my stomach!"**

**EMMETT get of that computer now! Your fired!**

**Today's Emmett will be played by optimist prime**

_5:Take'n care ub bidness_

**JPOV**

"Alright so here's the plan," Edward said, as we stood in an alley outside a warehouse, "Emmett you go in from the back, Jasper you go in through the top front window, Benjamin you go in through the cellar and start the fire when I give you the signal, I'll wait for your signal, Emmett and Jasper."

"Got it," I said.

"Cullens, vampires in disguise," Emmett sung to himself.

"Kay then…" Edward said staring at him, "Move out!"

I ran up and jumped on the ledge of a neighboring window then from there I jumped to the other window ledge on the target building. I picked the lock in about .5 seconds and entered. I looked around then closed my eyes used my powers to sense where the people where. "Emmett, there are 5 people in front of you and 3 around the corner. Benjamin there are two guards at the top of the stairs," I said in a walky talky.

**EmPOV**

"Emmett, there are 5 people in front of you and 3 around the corner." I heard Bumble bee (aka Jasper) say over the walky talky. Alright lets do this.

I ran strait into the crowd of people and roared as I jumped in the air and attacked. "Die you dirty desepticons!"

"What the f…" henchman #1 said started but couldn't finish in light of his new decapitation.

"Another successful mission for the autobots!" I screamed and the three other guards came running towards me. "Foolish bots, shall be defeated if you choose the wrong path. However if you choose the path of justice and join us, you will be forgiven." Then they shot me and one ricocheted and killed one of them.

"What the hell!" they screamed and started running.

"You chose wrong," I said and ran and snapped ones neck, leaving the other one on his knees begging for mercy. "I gave you a chance and you didn't take it."

**BPOV**

"Benjamin there are two guards at the top of the stairs." Jasper told me. I then ran up the stairs behind the two guards. "Hello!"

"Who the…" Then I pulled out all the water out of their bodies and set the dry bodies on fire. Then I ran up the next flight of stairs and waited at a window for the signal.

**EdPOV**

I saw a flashing light in the window and new it was the signal that Jasper and Emmett had killed the men and taken the "stuff." I then repeated the signal telling Benjamin to set the building on fire. Ha this what happens when you mess with Mr. Ed!

That idiot secretly kept crates in crates at this warehouse. Never telling a soul, but he did think about it…

"Hey Edward we got all the crates in the trucks, but what's in the crates anyway?" Jasper asked as he stopped running next to me.

"All his money." I laughed evilly.

"Hey Edward you okay, your acting a little ooc…" He said, "Oops I mean your acting different."

"Well 5 chapte… I mean a couple of days with power and money changes people."

"Right…" Then Emmett came and we waited as the building burn to ashes. "So what are we waiting for now?" Jasper asked.

"For Mr. Mario to come and then he'll be taken care of swiftly, and we can just sit and watch." I smiled more evilly than I ever did. "This what happens when you declare war on me!"

**APOV**

The warehouse started to burn and that meant I should get into position. Now all I had to do was wait… _I then saw a man pull up to the warehouse and start to panic and scream with rage. The clock in the car read 12:13. _So about 30 minutes.

-----------------------------30 minutes later of elevator music---------------------

"What the hell happened to my warehouse!?" Mr. Mario screamed, getting angrier every second.

"Hello Mario," Edward said walking out of the shadows.

"YOU! I'll kill you!" he screamed.

"Then you'll never know where your money is being stored."

"Damn you…"

"Yeah, bye." Edward said as Jasper pulled up with the limo and Edward got into it. Then I pulled the trigger, but someone got in the way. Damn I didn't see that.

"No usa shot a Luigi!" Mario screamed.

Then Edward ran up and kicked Mario through a wall.

**That's all folks!**


	6. ejection

**Sorry for the delay of chapter…**

_6:ejection_

**EdPOV**

"Al right now that we've got all that idiots money, and he's dead, lets recover one more thing." I said.

"What?" Rosalie asked.

"A file that he kept the location of all the other mob's money and hideouts, maybe even more." Alice told her before me.

"So it would be helpful to have if anything happens which I feel it will." I said thinking of the mob war I plan on starting. All I need is an excuse to start it… "So here's the plan. Jasper will disable the security. Benjamin will take out the west wing, Rose you take out the east, Alice the north and I'll get the south. Emmett you go to the computer room at the top floor, here's the map of how to get there. It only uses floppy discs, so you can't use a cd to copy the files, when you get there I'll tell you what to do.

"Alright."

**EmPov**

"Alright Edward I'm in the computer room. Wait wouldn't it have been easier if you did this…" I started.

"DON'T QUESTION ME!"

"Right, sorry about that."

"Now we need to enter the password."

"Alright I'm on the screen, what's the password?"

"There are multiple ones. The first is Imafury"

"That's the password?" I laughed and typed it. It said hello and popped up the next password."

"Alright the next one is fluffykitten."

"Your kidding?"

"No, Emmett I'm not, but I'm starting to doubt why he's a crime lord…"

"Yeah, well I'm in, now what?"

"Go to… file cream puff…"

"No comment. All right I got it."

"Good now put in the floppy."

"Heh heh."

"Grow up Emmett."

"Sorry, but put in the _floppy."_

"Whatever is it in yet?"

"That what she said to Jasper."

"I'm telling him you said that, now drag the file onto the flop… disc."

"Fine its on."

"Good now eject the floppy."

"Heh heh."

"Oh my God Emmett grow up!"

"I don't want to!"

**once again, sorry for delay**


	7. u come here on the day of my daughter's

_**7:You a comm'n here on the day of me daughter's wedding**_

**EdPOV**

"Hello sir," the man said terrified._ Oh god don't kill me…_

"Hello Mr. Goldmen." I said.

"Ah I heard that you're daughter was getting married."

"Yes she is."

"I was also wondering if you could do me a favor…"

"You a comm'n here on the day of me daughter's wedding knowing that I must grant you one favor."

"Ahhh yes sir…"

"Well I can't refuse on such an occasion."

"thakkk yyou"_ I'm saved._

"So what is it that I'm so inclined to do for you?"

"I owe Mr. Smith some money and I was wondering if you could take care of it for me."

"No I won't pay it for you."

"Bbbuutt."

"But I will solve your problem," I smiled evilly. "My way…"

"How?"

"Emmett call Jasper, tell him operation **F.L.A.M.E. **is in operation."

"Yes Mr. Ed." He smiled and left.

"You are dismissed Mr. Goldmen." He ran away _almost_ as fast as a vampire.

"Edward what are you planning?" Bella asked me.

"I'm _cleansing _Chicago."

"What do you mean."

"Nothing honey."

"Well it better not ruin her wedding."

"It won't." I smiled and left.

**Well that's all for now, once again sorry for shortness and delay.**


	8. authors note

**Authors Note:**

This story is cancelled.

Sorry, deal with it.


End file.
